Toilet Tallulah, the queen of the sleaze bars, dripping with paste diamonds and gold plated necklaces, sits silently on the sidewalk projecting her twin peaks at any passing pedestrian. Covered in pink from top to tail she has lost her feather boa whilst drunk in last night's speakeasy. Or exchanged it for a pink gin! She needed a good clean up so I took her through the carwash which cost me double because she insisted on having her favorite pink foam! Sitting on the walnut steering wheel of our Range Rover she said she felt like the real Queen! As you can see from the gallery picture I soon put her in her place! She is signed on her bottom (something she's used to!) D Manning, Limited Edition (thank God!) and the number 6179 (probably her number of drunk arrests!). Clutching her bouquet of flowers and with pink bobbie sox and white tennies, she desperately tries to recapture the bloom of her youth. But fails miserably. Ugly is a personal perception, an individual opinion, but in her case she personifies all ugliness. With a nose that would petrify Pinnochio and limbs that could grace an anorexic stick insect she sits there waiting, waiting, waiting - - - -!
We always answer e-mails and are happy to supply further photos if required. Shipping will be free as all proceeds - an estimated $875,000 (boyhood homes of ex-presidents eat your heart out!) will go to charity. We will spend it at a Goodwill store!
     
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Toilet Tallulah, tinseltown's tippling tart